I should be ecstatic about my results but I am just not. My CM and my KG have not budged... not one bit, some of them even went up, saying that my BF% has dropped. I will know tomorrow exactly how much compared to the past results... that I am excited to see.
Despite all that I had a bad bad training day today and I could see it in my PT's eyes how disappointed he was in my performance... it always seems to happen that way. We will talk about my motivation and what I need to do in order to lose more weight and faster... we will talk about food and water and also that I need to train harder and stronger and increase my intensity, but when it comes down to it I seem to fail in actually doing all those things.
To him it probably seems like I am all talk and actually no action, I don't think he understands how hard it is for us "average" and overweight people, who are not fitness freaks and have bodies like G-ds. I have so much to lose before increasing resistance is not just difficult for obvious reasons but also the reason that I am carrying so much extra weight on my bones and muscles. Somehow I wish I could make him understand this. As much as I adore him... and I really really do! He is still very young and very over the top (for lack of a better word) and he pushes everyone to their limits... EVERY time!
I exercise a FUCK load (excuse the profanity) more than the average person and yes I could do better in my cardio workouts and my eating, but I am only human... I want to run and I want to cycle up huge mountains and I know the minute I do that I have reached a goal, but until then my knees and my ankles can't seem to carry my weight so I have to take it slow. But I know.... the trick to looking like this chick is to CARDIO CARDIO CARDIO
I will however not get too desponded about all the happenings of today. I will strive forward!
In love and in health
OG
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